Growing up I never really understood the point of asking someone their story, in my mind it did not matter where someone had come from or what their past had looked like. My feelings have since changed a bit, I still believe that someone’s past doesn’t define them but I also believe that it is very important to know people’s stories. Knowing someone’s story allows you to truly see someone for who they are. Church camp 101, we all sit in a circle and tell all these people (whom we have known for less than a week) our entire life story. Now I’m a talker but when it was my turn to tell my story I did not have much to say. “I grew up in church, got saved and baptized when I was six, and now I’m here.” I never took the time to truly explain to people who I was or what I had experienced, I even failed to mention the part that involved Jesus. Over the years my story has changed drastically in the best and worst ways possible, but I have yet to sit down and share my story of how Jesus took a selfish, hurting, bitter little girl, flipped her life upside down, and taught her the true purpose of living. Hi, my name is Rylie Weber I am currently 19 years old (as of today… yay) and I am a freshman at Oklahoma State University. I am so excited to share my story with you all! Growing up I was always the onery youngest child who was all the trouble. I have two sisters, Karlye who is the oldest, I’m not sure how old but she has a kid so she has to be old, she’s the responsible one and then there’s Bethany Grace, we call her Gracie, she’s just your typical middle child and let’s just say she’s the life of the party. Growing up with two sisters was honestly a blast, we got to surprise people with our fist-fights that looked like three grown men in a bar fight, I would joke and say my dad was proud but it wouldn’t be a joke and I would definitely be lying if I said it didn’t make my mom mad. “They are your kids Jerry.” He just sat back and laughed, until we got braces, then he bought boxing gloves. My sisters were and still are my best friends, they get under my skin more than anyone else in the world though I can’t lie. Enough with them, my mom and dad are Jerry Weber and Tori (I’ll explain later) Clark. My mom is everything I want to be one day, she’s loving and kind. She doesn’t overthink, she's bold, and she forgives everyone even if they don’t deserve it. She’s patient and gentle, two things that I want to be. My mom is the tinest human but she’s a middle school principal and all of those kids are so scared of her, I just don’t get it. She taught us that we could be anything we wanted no matter what anyone else had to say, she always knows just what to say and just when to say it. She is our biggest fan and best supporter. My dad, on the other hand, he’s a little rough around the edges, the older I get the more people say I’m just like him, which I don’t know if that’s a good thing or a bad thing (IYKYK). He is someone who will quite literally push you to be the very best version of yourself. He never gives up on anyone, he would give the shirt off his back for a complete stranger, no questions asked. He taught all of us girls that we don’t need a man, we mowed the lawn, changed tires, worked on rent houses, and did all the typical “son” chores around the house, but don’t get me wrong we had to “make a good wife one day” so we were doing the dishes and laundry after. On a real note, he taught us what hard work was and he showed us that it would get us anywhere we wanted to go. He never failed to humble us when we were wrong but he was always the first to congratulate us after a win. I really do have the very best family a girl could ask for. I grew up in good ole’ Chickasha, Oklahoma. My family moved to Chickasha the year I started Pre-K, my dad sold insurance, and my mom was a special education teacher. I grew up attending church and I accepted Jesus to be my Savior when I was just six years old, my sisters were getting saved so I mean why not join in? My life was smooth sailing other than the occasional whoopings for “being mean” to Gracie, until I was in sixth grade and my parents sat us down and told us they were getting a divorce. They really loved each other but they just could never make it work. I don’t really remember much of that time but I remember moving to a new house with my mom and just kind of going on with life like nothing ever happened. Fast forward to the summer before my freshman year of high school, I was at Fallscreek with my friend Clara and something just hit me, I realized I wasn’t saved. I was consistently going to church and answering all the questions but I didn’t truly have a relationship with Jesus. That July night I truly gave my life to Christ. (Fun Fact: That same night at a totally different camp my best friend Allison got saved, and I didn’t even know until she got home because she wasn’t allowed to have her phone.) I then got baptized and had that church camp high. I knew I had a relationship with God at that point but I sort of treated it as a one-way phone call, like He’s supposed to do all the communication and I’m just supposed to listen. Right? Wrong. COVID hit spring break of my freshmen year, I can’t lie it was a blast, no school, no homework, and it was awesome. Then January 3rd of 2021 rolled around, and it was a normal Sunday morning getting ready for church, then all of a sudden it wasn’t so normal anymore. OSBI investigators showed up at our house and knocked on the door, at the time I didn’t know it was OSBI, I didn’t even know what the OSBI was. I just knew I saw a woman and two men all dressed up in black suits, in a black SUV, knocking on the door and I wasn’t going to be the one to answer. My mom asked me to go to my room while she answered the door, something wasn't right, someone was obviously dead. “He has kids” were the only three words I heard. My dad was murdered, we had no details, no idea what happened, or if it was even real. It felt like a nightmare that would soon come to an end, which wasn't the case. It was real and it wasn't going to go away. There are two ways one can go in this situation, up or down, safe to say I went down. I became bitter and I shut everyone in my life out, I treated people so badly and quite simply didn't even want to be alive anymore. I wish I could tell you that it only lasted a couple of months but that wasn't the case, I continued to ignore everyone and everything for about two years. I lost friends and people that I loved dearly because I didn't care to be a good friend. I didn't deal with my personal issues and that affected every relationship in my life in a negative way, hurt people hurt people. I was hurting and I was hurting others in the process. I had to lean on God during these years because it was all I had, I was consistent in church and all the “normal” Christian camps and activities but I wasn't living for the Lord in any way. I was so bitter and so hard to love, that eventually led to losing one of my best friends. It is so upsetting that it took me losing him for me to open my eyes and realize that I've got to make a change, but sometimes God breaks our heart to save our soul. I had not surrendered every area of my life to God, “God I surrender my life to you but please don't take this or please let me still do this blah blah blah…” We shouldn't treat God like He is a genie, that's what I was doing. On July 31 of 2023, I fully surrendered to the fact that I needed help and could no longer do things on my own. I had to fully surrender to God and allow Him to control EVERY area of my life (and attend therapy) before He could change me and use me for His good. I would be lying if I said that every day isn’t still a struggle but I would also be lying if I told you God isn’t making drastic moves in my life. I am so proud to say that I am nowhere near the girl I was on that July night. God has changed me and I cannot wait to see what else He has in store for me, stay tuned! Everyone has a story and everyone's story matters.

Good talk,

Rylie With The Messy Life :)